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Welcome to BadmintonStamps. We're Philabuster and SkinnySlim, representing Philly and NYC respectively. We are very good looking. Thanks.

February 28, 2008

This Is Not A YMD Giveaway

So I had big plans for this Friday night. I was gonna get crunk like how I'm prone to do on Friday nights, head over to The Barbary, and catch a live set from The Yah Mos Def as they celebrate the release of their debut full-length album, which was released earlier this month. The album in question is pretty fucking awesome, truth be told. If you liked that Shocking Pinks record, but wished it were full of white-hot hip hop instead of repetitious indie whining, then welcome to paradise, stranger. Trouble is, I ain't in Philly. Nowhere close. So you can imagine the dilema. But I figure, there's no reason why the two guest list spots that would've been taken up by me and whoever I thought was cool/promiscuous enough to bring with me should go to waste. So shoot an e-mail with your proper name and the subject "FROM EAST FALLS TO THESE BALLS" to One lucky winner gets themselves and a +1 through the door free of charge, as well as your very own copy of Excuse Me, This Is The Yah Mos Def to have, hold, and taunt others with. Do it like whoa.

Thursday Photo Esssay

Robots Are The Best

Photo Credit)

Thursday Photo Esssay

A Slow And Painful Death

Photo Credit)

February 27, 2008

Asians Should Talk Like Mickey Rooney

It's truly amazing how young African Americans were able to co-opt the N word, the most vile term used against them, and turn it into a term of affection that only they can use. Talk about turning lemons into lemonade and flipping the switch pretty damn hard. "Hey racist white bastards, remember how you used to call us nigger? Well now you can't. Only we can. And we'll do it when we're hanging out and having fun." I really do believe it is one of the greatest things ever. That's why half-jew SkinnySlim (hey, half-blacks can say the n word) is going to do for looking like Hitler what blacks did for saying the N word. From this day forth, only Jews can dress like Hitler. And Jews, you really should dress like Hitler. I mean, screw that dude for real. Talk about this guy's nightmare. I'm like, "Hey Hitler in 1939, not only will you lose this war and commit suicide like a little bitch, but in the future the very much alive Jewish race run around, cocky as hell, and dress up like you. But no one else can do it. Germans, they can't dress up like you. Only Jews." But Jews have to put a twist on the Hitler look just like Blacks transformed nigger to nigga. That's why the moustache is always gotta be a bright day-glo color. Why? Cause we can, and no one can do anything about it. So see you tomorrow Hitlers, and remember, the salute is still offensive.

February 26, 2008

Haiku Review: Adam Arcuragi @ The Ethical Society, 2/21/08

Rittenhouse hushes
for alt-country story time.
Don't wake the neighbors.

The Pony Track Is Comin' At Your First Thing Tuesday Morning

Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!

February 21, 2008

Welcome Back

We all needed to take a couple years off, but it's been long enough and SkinnySlim says it's now okay to listen to "Hey Ya!" again.

Good Links Gone Bad

Rihanna sings "Umbrella" backed by Klaxons inside a
huge laser pyramid. And I ask you, what's not to like?

The New Republic's got a blog, and our own SkinnySlim dropped some serious polititical science on it this past Monday. Check out his inspired juxtaposition of presidential hopefuls Clinton and Obama to rappers Cam'ron and Jay-Z. It's way more insightful than all these PC/Mac comparisons, and even trumps my own Swiffer/Swiffer Wet analogy.

Live Nation announces the return of Spoon to Philadelphia, demonstrates their poor understanding of the word "intimate".

Tonight, GANG go for gold in the Philly Sound Clash finals. They're up against five other acts, although as recipients of our official endorsement last month, they must be considered the prohibitive favorites. Head over to World Cafe Live for the free coronation.

Also tonight, Adam Arcuragi, who has the distinction of being pretty much the only "singer/songwriter dude" we ever talk about here on the 'Stamps, has a quaint little EP release party at the Ethical Society on Rittenhouse Square. $10 gets you entry AND a copy of Helmikuu, a 12" slab of vinyl whose connection to all this is, at present, still not entirely clear.

February 20, 2008

Maroon 5 Should Not Travel Together

February 18, 2008

The Pony Track Opens Up

Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!

February 14, 2008

Thursday Photo Esssay

Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Photo Credit)

Thursday Photo Esssay


You Definitely Want Fries With That

For a lot of bands, remixes are kind of like value meals. Yeah, sometimes you just want the burger, but it's always nice to know you can add a shake if you feel like it. Take the latest single from London's The Crimea. It's a rambling, day-dreamy piece of pop ideal for lounging on the beach or working over a really good
piece of chewing gum. Nothin' wrong with that. But what if, like me, you're talented enough (and crazy enough) to dance and chew gum at the same time? Your beat needs have suddenly changed, and there are lot of bands out there that simply won't accomadate you. Those of you who've tried to breakdance to Jose Gonzalez know what I'm talking about. But The Crimea are nothing if not courteous, and if you want a tune that's boogie-minded, they're gonna give you more options than a choose-your-own adventure book. The Beatcave Remix of "Loop A Loop", a BadmintonStamps exclusive, is just one of ten different versions the band has made available through blogs they've personally selected. We're thrilled to be participating in the roll-out, and encourage everyone to supersize their computer's Crimea folder for just a few clicks more.

I Didn't Even Give Him A Dollar

It's difficult for SkinnySlim to treat those around me with respect, because I am so much better than everyone else. This is especially true with anyone who works in the service industry. Take, for example, bathroom attendants. If I'm going to give a guy a buck to watch me piss, I'm going to make him work for it. Last night, as I dined on mutton and more mutton, I had to relieve myself. I went into the bathroom, did my deed, and then insisted the bathroom attendant shake off any excess urine from my penis. What the hell else is he there for, to pump out cheap moisturizer cream? The one exception in the service industry is bartenders. You gotta show these guys and girls some love. That's why I always try to keep the bartender in mind when I pick songs on the jukebox. I know they hear the same goddamn seven songs over and over again, and they are probably in no mood to listen to "Sweet Home Alabama" or "You Shook Me All Night Long" again. So I make sure to go for the album tracks, the non-cliched tunes (like the two great ones below). Because while I normally don't mind pissing off, or on, those who serve me, bartenders are too risky to mess with. Sure, waiters can spit in my food and cab drivers can take me the long way, but bartenders can mix me a weak drink. In the face of such a horror, I must bite my lip and try to give 'em what they want.

February 13, 2008

Buttholes Vs Assholes

">>>And lastly, continuing on with their rogue program of teaching the youngest people possible how to play some of the worst music ever made, The Paul Green School Of Rock will be joined on Feb. 16 by none other than Gibby Haynes of the Butthole Surfers, also at the Troc. As of press time, Philebrity was planning an emergency airdrop of Harry Nilsson, Teenage Fanclub and Sam Cooke records on the kids. It's so sad to see youth wasted like this."

There are three distinct levels of sad at work here:

1) It's sad to see a local media personality openly disparage his own city's youth for participating in activities that promote creativity and cooperation.

2) It's sad to see a failed musician bitterly demean the accomplishments of so many promising others.

3) It's sad to see a grown ass man prove his cool by putting down 12 year olds.

I have a very hard time believing that Sam or Harry would describe what these kids are doing as wasteful. Writing a gossip blog on the other hand... ah, whatever. When Joey Sweeney brings Devo to town, please let us know.

Quick aside: Taste is taste is taste, but it's amazing that Joey would be so down on a band that used his likeness for their cover art.

February 12, 2008

Four Year Plan

Let me take you back to the year 2004. February had 29 days, LSU had
just won the BCS championship, and whales were spontaneously exploding. It was also, incredibly, the last time that Les Savy Fav flew their freak flag in Philadelphia. For real, one of the greatest bands around has been surreptitiously avoiding the city of brotherly love for nearly half a decade, even as they've circled the rest of the globe blazing bold new trails for fat guys in t-shirts doing all the singing. But now, 2008 is upon us. February once again has an extra day, the Tigers have won another national title, and Les Savy Fav has, at long last, scheduled another Philadelphia performance! Their April 5th show at The TLA is a surefire sell-out, not to mention required rocking for any true 'Stampers in the 2-1-5. I guess history repeating itself isn't such a bad thing. Then again, I'm not the one who's gonna have to clean up all that blubber.

February 11, 2008

Haiku Review: The Major Leagues @ North Star Bar, 2/8/08

Headliners for real.
Suitably buzzed, the band wield
Next Big Thing-ish chops

Trick Daddy

You want to go to a sporting event with my dad. He has, over the course of his sixty odd years, witnessed in person several of the most famed games of all time. These include Don Larsen's perfect game, the 1970 Knick championship (aka the "
Willis Reed game"), Game Six of the 1986 World Series, and last week's classic Super Bowl. How does he do it? It's a combination of three key factors. The first is having connections. My dad worked in the entertainment business his whole life, and the entertainment business loves to dole out the perks for its employees. The second is New York. You're going to get more chances at classic games when you root for teams from New York rather than, say, Milwaukee. And the third factor? Fixing. My dad has single-handedly fixed many of the most famous sports moments in the past half century. He's pimp like that. I mean, the guy's called Poppa Slim for a reason. It's just how he do. This kid personally doused Larsen's ball with Vaseline, injected Willis Reed with a super cortisone/steroid shot, and minutes prior to last week's kickoff he texted photos to Tom Brady of Giselle having sex with me. As for the ball passing through Bill Buckner's legs, well that shit just happened.

The Pony Track's Got A Licence

Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!

February 7, 2008

Thursday Photo Esssay

Extra Special K

Photo Credit)

Thursday Photo Esssay

Jump, Jump

Photo Credit)

Ready For The Rotation

Here's a look at the albums spinning in the SkinnySlim record player this month.

Hot Chip -
Made In The Dark
I'm a big proponent for collaboration. I have a collaborator on this website, I have a collaborator when I'm making movies, and I usually have a collaborator when I'm making love. Hot Chip are Exhibit A in my ongoing case for collaboration. This is a band. Music made by a group of people working in sync and interacting on a sophisticated and elegant level. Heavy, epic, beautiful, funny, hotchipish; Radiohead is going to have to scrap the world tour and get back in the studio if anyone has a chance to top this album in '08. Not just because it's incredible and from this year, but because it's incredible and sounds like this year. Stream here, buy today.

Times New Viking - Rip It Off
This band sorta makes me cry all reminisce tears because they sound like Pavement and Guided By Voices if some teenage kids in the nineties were in a great Pavement/Guided By Voices rip-off band. I myself was a teenage kid in the nineties in a Pavement/Guided By Voices rip off band (ADP, what!), but without the great.

Various Artists - The Best Of Bob Dylan's Theme Time Radio Hour
This two disc collection released through some Dylan fan magazine thingy collects the best country, blues, doo-wop, gospel, and jazz tracks from Dylan's themed hour-long radio show. Hence the title of the compilation. Title could have been even more descriptive if it was "The Truly Excellent Best Of Bob Dylan's Theme Time Radio Hour".

Vampire Weekend - s/t
Talk about some shit I don't want to like. Preppy college boys who reek of "arrogance towards their girlfriends douchebaggery" become every amateur music websites Hope Chest crush by playing lightweight Wes Anderson pop music influenced by Africa. They say things like, "Lil Jon, he always tells the truth", which seems mathematically disproved by the Lil Jon line, "I done came to the club 5011 times". But, hey maybe not. Maybe Lil Jon has been to the club every day for fifteen straight years, ever since he was 15 years old. I mean, who am I to argue with Lil Jon? And who am I to argue with possible arrogant douchebags when they sound so good.

February 5, 2008

You Can't Read The Rock And Roll

I went to see this Broadway play last week called Rock And Roll. It's this sort of enjoyable, slight, and cutesy baby boomer glorification disguised as political commentary written by Tom Stoppard. Anyway, whatever. The theater it was showing in had this electronic closed-captioning display scrolling just off of stage right (that's the left side, non theater people). So while the actors were performing their lines, this Achtung Baby-ish neon screen flashed their words at about a ten second delay. Example transcript:

British Actor: Communism is fucking great.

Actor With Borat-like European Accent: Iv you say Communism iz great in Englaand dey laugh at you, if you say Capitalism iz great in Prague they kell you!

Bad Pink Floyd song plays

This electronic text scroll was a real hindrance to my semi-enjoyment of the play. My date actually had to hide one side of her face to block the bright screen. Luckily, it was the badly disfigured side of her face. Now I want to make something very clear: I don't hate deaf people any more than I hate hearing people. In fact, I'm into disabilities. I even went on a date with a chick who had a badly disfigured side of her face. (Well, she didn't actually have a badly disfigured side of her face, but at least I was willing to go on a date with a girl who had a badly disfigured side of her face for the sake on this story. Which has got to be worth something.) But we have to be realistic. Not everybody can enjoy everything. Children can't go to casinos, shorties can't go on the rollercoaster, and I can't piss in the girl's room. Maybe deaf people gotta give up the theater. This is a live performance, not t.v., and I can't turn your closed captioning off. And how can deaf people enjoy a play when they have to keep shifting their heads back and forth like that. Frankly, it makes the deaf people look retarded. Or, I guess I should say, it makes the deaf people look mentally disabled. And God knows, if there's one thing we can agree on, it's that the mentals got no place in the theater.

Snack Attack

So Dave P, Adam Sparkles, and Plastic Little walk into a gay bar. No joke. Starting next week, the creators of such hipster havens as Making Time and [click.] will be bringing their cocainesexjams and sparklemotion to
Woody's, the self-proclaimed "Gay Mecca" of Philadelphia, for a new, twice-monthly free party called SNACKS. Set to take place on the first and second Tuesdays of every month, SNACKS makes its debut on February 12th with free PBR and a live set from Plastic Little. Future guests include MSTRKRFT and Brazil's Gui Boratto, which is all well and good. But obviously, the main attraction will be the ridiculous interactions between regular Woody's patrons and the pride of the hipster fleet. Last we checked, irony and body odor were neither fierce nor fabulous, although beards seem like promising common ground. Are cowboy hats destined to be the new trucker hats? And how long before we see a Making Time flyer that looks like this? Stay tuned, Philadelphia.

February 4, 2008


Larry Csonka, star running back of the famed and revered 1972 Dolphins, the only professional football team to complete an undefeated season.

Haiku Review: Hot Chip @ The Highline Ballroom, 2/2/08

Funk/soul/rock and roll's
undisputed champions
justify their belt.

The Pony Track Is Light Sensitive

Comin' atcha first thing every Monday morning, it's The Pony Track, a super-fantastic short distance dedication to BadmintonStamps Collective founding member and internationally renown symbol for musical excellence Aaron "Pony" Child. No fancy links, no clever write-ups, 'cause these awesome songs don't need no splainin'. So c'mon, ride the pony!

February 1, 2008

Breaking News: It's Not Too Late To Whip It!

BadmintonStamps has turned out our sources and double-checked our facts, and now we're tellin' you straight up: Devo will be playing Philadelphia's Festival Pier on Saturday, June 28th, 2008 as the headlining act for Day 1 of the weekend-long Paul Green School of Rock Festival. Devo's appearance was announced by Paul Green himself last Saturday night during a student showcase at the Trocadero. The festival, held
last year in Asbury Park, NJ with headliners Ween and Bad Brains, is bound for Penn's Landing in its second year of life. Geez, no sooner did Vineland have its plug pulled than the Garden State starts hemorrhaging festivals left and right. No word yet on ticket sales or the the Day 2 headliner, but for now we're happy just to be laying out the booji boy welcome mat.

SkinnySlim's List

In Rotation...

Times New Viking - Rip It Off Hot Chip - Made In The Dark Bob Dylan - Self Portrait
Vampire Weekend - s/t Bob Dylan - The Best Of Bob Dylan's Theme Time Radio Hour White Williams - Smoke


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